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Maegan Hagan’s Review of 50 Shades of Grey

I want to begin by saying I am absolutely positively encouraging everyone to watch 50 Shades of Grey! I want you to form your own opinion! Without further ado:

Top 8 Things That Made Me Cringe While Watching 50 Shades of Grey

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8.  Anastasia’s Hairy Legs

Obviously, I am exaggerating a bit,but I kid you not-every person in that theater GASPED when they saw how much hair was on her body the first time Mr. Grey took off her clothes! I actually consider myself to be a feminist, and I was surprised that much hair on her body made it into the final cut of the film. I do believe it was on purpose. Anastasia’s character is supposed to be very naive! I get it! But, if you know you are going over to your new boo thang’s MANSION to possibly hook up-you better shave those hairy armpits, legs, and bush! I mean it was everywhere! I, as a semi-feminist audience goer, was kind of alienated when I saw that!

7. The HUGE Rip Off of Twilight

It is no secret that 50 Shades of Grey, (The Book,) was originally intended to be Twilight Fan Fiction. I was hoping, however, that the movie would be changed a little bit so we weren’t reminded of that…nope! Not at all! That was wishful thinking on my part! At one point I dozed off, woke up, and said, “Where am I? Why is Edward not sparkling in the sun?” I mean from the walk in the woods, to her being clumsy, to her visiting her mom in Georgia. (I know, Bella’s mom temporarily was living in Florida! Way to go for moving it one state away!)

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6. Charlie Hunnam is not Christian Grey

I truly believe Christian Grey was ultimately cast wrong. Jamie Dornan is cute, but he is not the on screen persona that we could have had, had they gone through with Charlie Hunnam, (AKA Jax from Sons of Anarchy,). I believe that in itself put them with the wrong foot going out of the gate. There is something that is slightly…vanilla about Jamie Dornan.

5. Where was the pain?

It is understandable that Anastasia a virgin, and Mr. Grey was trying to EASE her in slowly to that life style…but the main attraction to 50 Shades of Grey is the pain with pleasure. With the movie, we see a lot of pleasure, but the pain is forced. When he is dominating her it is clear he is holding back! Even in the anti-climatic scene where Anastasia runs off crying, (boo hoo my billionaire boyfriend is a fetish with inflicting pain on me!) I wasn’t feeling it! Not. At. All.

4. Cinematography Is Truly The Best Thing About This Movie

That’s not even a huge task to accomplish! Seattle is beautiful!

3. Let’s Try and Sneak In Accurate Portrayal of BDSM Life Style In There

Once again, it was no secret that the BDSM community was highly offended of the book’s portrayal of a BDSM relationship. I felt like the movie had the opportunity to get it right, where the book had failed terribly, and they fell short by every degree imaginable. BDSM is not about signing a contract-that’s slavery. BDSM is a fascinating lifestyle with many subcultures to it. I love that 50 Shades of Grey has people talking about it, but why not get it right? If you would like to see an accurate representation of a dom submissive, please rent or download Secretary. It is a very sexy movie! And all about BDSM!

2. If I am paying to 9.00 to see a movie about sex, how bout the male lead, have to show just as much nudity as his female lead? I want to see some dick! It’s only fair!

1. The best thing about the whole movie- was the trailers before the film for up and coming movies. This is just a bad time for movies. And, the sad thing is it doesn’t have to be. That is a completely different blog all together, but real quick, let me tell you about the two trailer’s I saw that looked really good!

Train wreck Starring Amy Schumer

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Actually looks pretty good, and for the most part I usually can’t stand Amy Schumer. This looks like one of her most likable character to date! She actually reminded me a lot of myself, which is a scary thought that is where Romantic Comedies are going. But, then it’s kind of cool and more believable.

And the trailer that had me almost JUMPING out of my seat from anticipation:

Aloha

aloha

Within the first minute of the trailer, I knew it was written by my favorite movie writer of all time-Cameron Crowe. He is also the director. First movie he has done in a while and I am really excited about it! Cameron Crowe is one of my idols. Aloha is about Bradley Cooper, who plays a celebrated military contractor that is returning to the site of his greatest career triumphs and re-connects with a long-ago love while unexpectedly falling for the hard-charging Air Force watchdog assigned to him, (played by Emma Stone-another one of my absolute favorites!) Can not wait!

To summarize, I do not want to discourage you from watching 50 Shades of Grey. If you would like to learn more about the BDSM life style, please Google it, it will be WAY more accurate, and finally-someone send Anastasia Steele some fucking Naire! EVERYWHERE! IT was EVERYWHERE!

If you like what you see, please subscribe to my blog post. You can also find me on Facebook under Maegan Hagan, you can also find me on Twitter @GoogleMeMae Instagram @Live4Hope Google + Maegan Hagan and Tumblr, mylifeasmaeganhagan

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