Was anyone else extremely agitated all week long? I talked to a few girls and it seemed as if I wasn’t the only one. I like to feel like I am being present and with everyone, and this past week I feel empty and angry for no reason, I’ve been shaky, and quite frankly confused.
I told my coworker Pam that and she said that she used to do that right before a big storm. I said, “If that’s true then there’s going to be a fucking hurricane! ”
Trent’s been kind of weird since I posted the story. He was fine the first morning, but it seemed as if he’s been a little off the last few days. However, Trent and I are around each other SO much that I often feel like we play off each others emotions. And since I’m being so odd I think it might be making him odd.
So, let me tell you what’s really been bothering me. I’ve been having this SUPER intense dream.
In the dream I’m super intense and happy and I am pregnant. Sometimes I am full term, sometimes I have triplets, sometimes it’s just a seed in my belly, but it’s there. And there is this truly overwhelming feeling of joy and happiness.
But then it takes a turn for the weird. (Of course it does.) I used to take care of people that are mentally challenged. In the dream the people that I used to take care of are standing in a circle and they are closing in on my very pregnant belly and they start to chant shit! “Section eight!” Is what they usually chant.
I’m not sure what it means but I’m worried that it’s my biological clock ticking VERY loudly.
The truth is I’m not so sure if it’s the right time. I know there is no right time, but I’m 100 percent positive it definately isnt now.
It’s weird because I think after you get married there is this whole pressure on you to move to the next step. It’s almost as if society can’t believe it’s just going to be JUST me and Trent for the rest of our lives.
And the truth is we DO have a pretty fabulous life. I do what I want, when I want, and I have nothing that ties me to this earth other than Trent and it’s a pretty epic feeling. My life isn’t glamorous, but the sex is pretty fabulous.
But then I think of the over whelming sense of happiness I have in the dream and think of how pretty incomplete I’ve been my entire life and I wonder if that’s what I’ve been missing.
I can’t talk to anyone about this dream because it seems as if I am the only girl my age that hasn’t had a baby yet.
So there it is. What do you think the dream means?